Thursday, September 22, 2011

Welcome to Spain.

Imagine you've spent nearly a year planning a trip to Paris. This is not your first time to Paris. You LOVE Paris, its beautiful and perfect in every way. There is literally nothing you dislike about Paris, and everyday you are anxiously awaiting the moment you step off the plane and look around and take in all that is Paris.

The day finally comes, and you head to the airport excitedly. The flight is turbulent and stormy, but you don't care, it just makes you all the more excited to land in Paris. You barely land safely in Paris and walk unsteadily into the airport. You worry a little - this is unfamiliar to you - it doesn't look like the Paris airport. But you calmly think "There's NO way we could be anywhere but Paris, they must've changed the airport, that's all..." and other self-soothing thoughts.

You stop to ask people in the airport for help finding your way out to where your Taxi must be waiting. No one seems to be understanding you. They say things like "I wish I could be more help" and "Sorry, I don't know anything about that, but I'm sure everything will be fine." You start to worry - finding your way out of the airport should be easier than this. Why is everyone so uncertain?

You see the exit sign finally, and with a sign of relief, run through the doors..... only to find, you are most definitely NOT in Paris. How could this happen???? I told them Paris! That's where I am supposed to be. You frantically begin to search for help - telling anyone who will listen that this isn't right. This isn't supposed to be happening, I should be in Paris enjoying everything I am comfortable with there.

You see a sign that says Welcome to Spain. Spain?!?! How could they be so wrong?? I got on a flight to PARIS. I know I did.... what is happening here? But no one else seems alarmed. No one else seems to have ended up in the wrong place. You spend the next 24 hours wandering around the airport in Spain, trying to tell them, begging them to help you get to Paris. But they just shake their heads and say sorry, you're meant to be in Spain now.

Some time later, you finally accept that you are stuck in Spain, and decide its time to leave the airport and stop believing that a plane is going to whisk you away to Paris. You think you might as well try to enjoy something about Spain if you can't leave. You begin to explore, and at first all you can think about is "That's not the way it is in Paris..." But soon you catch your breath, and realize that Spain has its own unique beauty. It may not be Paris, but it's not an awful place to be after all.

You read guidebooks, you have to learn a new language. You meet a bunch of people you would never have met without this crazy trip to Spain. Its a huge investment to take the time to learn about Spain but you know you don't have a choice so you struggle through it all.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going...from Paris. And they are all bragging about what a fantastic time they've had there. Sometimes they complain about Paris and you want to shake them.. at least they got to go. They too could've ended up in Spain. But they didn't... They don't visit you in Spain, but who would leave the safety and comfort of Paris? You don't blame them, but it does get lonely sometimes.

And the pain of that never goes away, because you'll always wonder what your life would be like in Paris too. But if you spent your whole life bitter about Paris, you'd miss all the truly amazing things about Spain. And every single day, you find something new to love and cherish about Spain.
*This is my adaptation of a well known story by Emily Kingsley. I hope this helps people understand how I've felt throughout Addison's little life. It's been such a rollercoaster and I believe we have a long journey ahead of us yet. Thanks for taking the time to read this, and for those who think of us, pray for us, write, call or message.... Thank you. I've had some friends who have faded away throughout the past year when I have needed them the most, but that's only natural when you go through something like this. I just want to thank those of you who have stood by us, because it really helps us stay positive to know we are never alone in this. Adam and I are so greatful for the special support system God has placed in our lives.

1 comment:

  1. This touched my heart. I don't have kids of my own and cannot possibly imagine what this time was like... But this is a beautiful thought/story/feeling despite the trials and tribulations of your daily life. It's just a blessing that even with the problems you can see the beauty.

    Love and prayers.